Finding Happiness in Your Life

How to find inner happiness is a question that takes some people their entire lives to answer. Why does it take so long to find something so important to our well being? The answer is that getting a grasp on joy that doesn't depend on outside influences like material or social situations is very difficult. In fact, many don't know where to begin the search for it. 

If you are a goal oriented person, always keeping your eyes looking forward and checking off your successes along the way, perhaps you have found that your happiness after reaching each goal is temporary. Making and reaching goals on the path of life is a worthwhile endeavor. Ultimately, however, if you measure your happiness by your achievements alone, it will eventually become difficult to maintain. By stopping this habit, you will have taken one of the first steps to inner peace and happiness.

The same goes for happiness derived from material items or social status. They are both good to have, but their acquisition should not be your only source of happiness. 

Inner happiness stems from inner peace. Feeling at peace inside is not as simple as turning on a light. Logically, if it were, then everyone would know precisely how to find happiness! Look at what you have been trying to do to bring peace into your heart. The truth is, if the self help methods that you have been trying are not giving you results, you need to try something else.

For many, step one is realizing how to love themselves. Even if you think you have a reasonably high self esteem or others don't identify you as having weaknesses in your personality, when you really do some soul searching, you might find that you aren't truly happy. It is easy to think that the self you present when you are with other people is your true self. Most of the time, it isn't. Think about all the times you had negative thoughts about yourself or allowed your inner voice to degrade you or talk you down from trying something new. This is not self love; it is more like self loathing. A good question to ask yourself is, "Would I say this to someone who really needed a friend?"

Chances are you wouldn't talk to a friend or family member the way you talk with yourself. When someone needs your help, you probably give them sound, uplifting, optimistic advice. Why not do the same for yourself? Be your own best, trusted friend and advocate. This may be one of the most difficult things you do, but with practice, it gets easier. If you have been having negative thoughts about yourself for your whole life, don't expect to turn things around in a few days, weeks, or even months; you have a big knot to unravel. Consider keeping a journal of your daily thoughts and then write yourself a response as if you were giving advice to your friend. Save and reread your entries so you can track your improvement over time.

Slowly, you will learn to talk to yourself the same way you would talk to others, doing it without prompting yourself. How would you treat a friend or loved one in need? Encouraging words, favors, and thank you's are all things you can, and should, be doing for yourself. When was the last time you told yourself that you can rise to a challenge, taken time to do something that you love, or thanked yourself for something? You will be astonished at the change that this will bring to your life. It has often been said that you can't help others unless you are in a good place with yourself. Don't let your well run dry!

How to find inner happiness is by finding inner peace, which starts when you learn to truly love yourself. Finding happiness is not an easy thing to do, but if you find ways to end negative inner talk and boost your relationship with yourself, it is something that can be successfully learned and practiced. Go at your own pace and realize that you will stumble along the way, but don't delay the journey any longer!